Sometimes I get so irritated with people. Oen conversation with a new girl started? Whrere do you want to live? Oh I hate our rental. It is just to small. Next to neighbors. I want to live on some property with a huge huse. Hmm do I judge? yep,I shouldn't but I do. I judge her. I think. ph brother don't come to my house and visit. I live in the tiniest house on the block. People come in and judge it instantly.yep I am over it. I supposse iI read into everyones stuck up aura. Trying to imprress people withthier snotty comments about superb housing and 1st worls problems. Maybe Ii am sensitive. I live ina aver yaflfuent neighborhood with people that are affluent and talk about affluent things. Yes I like it here. Yes I choose to live here but do I choose the conver sations? I have been better about avoiding people that I can't handle talking to about deep conversations etc. Sometimes I can handle it. I pretend to handle it. But mostly I can't . No I don't want to live in a big fancyhouse and live hteir lifestyle. I supposse sometimes it ould be nice to have your own stero room or your own hottub or big bedorom Who wouldn't like to live in a beautiful house. But that's not my life and its ok. My life is rewarding in other ways. I supposse I am sick of people talking down to me and I figured out it my be me bringing that converstion to that subject. Trying to steer clear of those onversations is a good thing to do. Life can be about more the nthe 4 alls we surround ourselves with, the car running, socer moms, dull conversations etc. It can be more rewarding. Life can have deeper meaning. I hide my emtions and feelings. I hide my pain and physical problems. I supposse its ok not to say everything to be an elusive character. I supposse its ok to take turns and not be the friend who always calls. Maybe someone can call me for a change. Maybei ts ok to just be a person and work onmyself a little. Trying to be better rather thenc omparing myself to everyone lese. Am i wmart enough
' rich enough? skinny enough? do my kids measure up? These are all questions to let go. live my life and apreciate ohers and their lives also. Finding joy in the journey
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